Don Jamieson is a guest contributor to Loudwire. He is the co-host of That Metal Show, which recently completed its 14th season on VH1 Classic. You can also catch Jamieson on the stand-up comedy circuit. Keep up with him at his official website or his Twitter page. Please note that Don Jamieson’s opinions do not necessarily reflect those of Loudwire. Check out his picks for the Top 10 Songs About Enemies below:
An “enemy” is something or someone who is out to injure or cause harm to an opponent. Which is why it’s no coincidence that the word “enema” sounds just like it. Anyone who wants to shove three feet of rubber pipe up my ass is no friend of mine.
But enough about three feet up rubber pipe up my ass … you can have deadly enemies, enemies of the state, enemy at the gates, go behind enemy lines and be your own worst enemy but the best enemies to have are the ones put to song. Imaginary enemies are much less dangerous and with enemies like that, who needs friends? Huh?
Luckily I don’t have any enemies, just the occasional jerk-off on Twitter. But if you’d like to be one, just use the word “frenemies” around me. You’ll have an enemy for life.
Keep your friends close but these 10 tunes about enemies closer.
“F–k Your Enemy”
Album: Use Once and Destroy
Rival writings: “Dick the system, screw the city, forget you were, forget you were…”
Always good, sound advice from spiritual guru and front man extraordinaire, Phil Anselmo. You what they say…if you can’t beat ‘em, F–K ‘EM!
Rival writings: “It’s a cold, cruel, harsh reality, got stuck here with your enemies…”
A bloody, violent video and based on the above lyric, a song about being trapped in an elevator with Bieber and his posse.
Album: Enemy of God
Rival writings: “Systems have failed, rules can’t control, corrupt dictators, forever dethroned…”
Lyrics that foretell an ominous future and the fate of N.Y. mayor Bill DiBlasio.
Rival writings: “You! You’re another s–t-talking punk to me, you’re inspiration for what I never want to be…”
The exact thing you would say if you were trapped in an elevator with Bieber (see Shinedown above).
“Sleep Is the Enemy”
Album: Sleep Is the Enemy
Rival writings: “Stay still, relax, screw that, pull the alarm, make the waves, roll the dice, suck the life, beat on the brat…”
An adrenaline-fueled anthem that targets a peaceful night’s rest as a deadly adversary and makes a Ramones reference at the same time.
Rival writings: “Enemies never die, conflict is unending, chaos never ceases, where does the solution lie…”
The Jasta-farian always writes intense, thought-provoking lyrics but would it kill him to write about puppies and chocolate and rainbows once in a while?
“The Enemy Inside”
Album: Dream Theater
Rival writings: “Under the weight of the world on my chest, I buckle and break as I try to catch my breath…”
An adversarial anthem from the boys from Berklee and a perfect description of having Chris Christie accidently fall on top of you.
“Public Enemy No. 1”
Album: Too Fast For Love
Rival writings: “Do you know how it feels to be under the gun, on the run, having fun when you’re young…”
Unfortunately I don’t know how that feels Motley Crue. My mom likes me home by 9.
“Know Your Enemy”
Rage Against the Machine
Album: Rage Against the Machine
Rival writings: “No I got no patience, so sick of complacence with the D the E the F the I the A the N the C the E…”
In their time, “The Machine” made a career of raging out against the status quo and relentlessly challenging the norm. And yet, still made spelling fun!
“Blood of My Enemies”
Album: Hail to England
Rival writings: “Three sons have I and they ride by my side, the fierce, the black and the wicked are their names…”
The Manowar version of My Three Sons but instead of Ernie, Robbie and Chip, their three sons are Fierce, Black and Wicked.